Have you ever considered how you gained independence and learned to become a responsible adult? Listening to a friend convey her thoughts on the topic of growing pains, I found myself pondered my past, unfolding early memories.
What were the cornerstones which allowed you to become the person you are today? Was it many experiences, or a just a few paramount things that happened? Did you learn primarily from a happy situation or from from the school of hard knocks?
For me there were two things that come to mind. First, I had the unfortunate experience of being involved in two car wrecks during high school and consequently undergoing facial scar revision, during college years. Because of this, I was offered the gift of learning how to feel gratitude for life and to give thanks for my physical functioning body and it also occured then, that all people are suffering. Some suffer on the inside and others on the outside and so I began to understand what compassion means.
The other 'life~changer' happened when I was a freshman in college. The blue skies turned dark one November afternoon when my boyfriend broke up with me. This was the first day my world came to a halt, still and desolate, as if I were floating in a dream, empty and alone.
What happened next:
A few days later, I began writing about my feelings. This was a gift as I was privy to see more concretely, what was going on in my life and that helped me to cope. Soon I devised a plan of action to reinvent the person I had been, sick of feeling alone and lost. A goal without a plan is just a wish; Antoine de Saint Exupery. At first, my energy was fueled by thinking; "I will show that guy"! But in the end, it wasn't about that guy at all. It turned out that his 'dropping me' was a gift he allowed me to give to myself.
For the first time in my life, I began respecting and taking care of who I was, both inside and out. I became a new creation and started making new healthier choices in my life and took on the responsibility of trying to be and look my best. I quit smoking cigarettes and started exercising. I realize now that this "plan", was actually my personal formula for becoming an responsible adult.
Thinking back, the hardest teenage experiences are what forced me to realize I needed to take action to help myself become a healthy and whole individual. So much good came out of this period of my life as I made a conscious decision to become a more social and responsible person!
Taking charge of one own happiness is an on going project, don't you think?
A new doll's in town and her name is Patience. Her whimsically wonderful updo and super stylish ensemble make me very happy! This Art Doll is a handmade gift from artist Dena Wilton of Wilton Art, actually she was "a trade". Dena said she called her doll Patience because it took Patience to finish her!
Patience reminded me to be patience andthat was good because upon her arival:
~It Was Hot~
We waited for sixty- seven days to experience a day with temperatures under 100° and it finally happened!
~We Had Fire~
With a eerie type of fear we waited, as our tiny town became surrounded by fire for more than a week. Smoke and ash filled the air and many had to evacuate their homes, with sixty -one burned in our small county alone. It started freaking me out and my husband said that worrying wasn't going to change a thing, that I needed to calm down and so I tried.
The fire prompted me to think about how grateful I am for all that we have and ponder how different life would be to loose everything. I used to think I could do it pretty easily, but after trying on the idea realistically, it would probably make me go into shock and need to mourn for a time. It would mean the death of part of me.
I examined what a "house" really means and "stuff" too. How it brings comfort, safety, triggers memories, defines who we are, shields us from the world and so much more. A house and things have energy in them too, from being loved. Maybe you have worn a scarf for many years that just feels right, as if it's an extension of you.
Thankfully all the fires in our area are out now and we feel super fortunate!
~We Experienced Drought~
This year in Texas we have felt serious drought, the worst on record. Each morning for months I've watered our gorgous old pecan trees trying to keep them alive and who knows maybe it has done nothing? Then a miracle happened!! Yesterday and last night we had some real rain and finally everything seems to be taking a turn for the better!
The reward for waiting PATIENTLY is that life WILL change and become BEAUTIFUL again.
This had me thinking about:
For "our trade" Dena wanted a pochette. I'd been pondering the symbolism of Transformation , so that became the inspiration of her double sided Butterfly Bag. It is presently flying North to meet the lovely lady Dena. May she feel transformed as she carries her new bag!!
Have a lovely week each of you, watching the seasons change!
While waiting in a line to buy a cart full of groceries I approached the checker who explained, that after me, her lane would become an "Express Lane" only. She jumped up onto the counter, changed the sign and started checking my groceries.
Soon after, another woman made her way into the line. I looked back and smiled at her and she gave me a dirty look. It didn't take long to surmised that the anger stemmed from her perceiving I had broken the "Express Lane" rules.
Even thought the lady was angry and she was wrong, I decided not to tell her about what had happened a few moments earlier.It taught me that:
☞THINGS ARE NOT ALWAYS AS THEY SEEM
so, DON'T MAKE ASSUMPTIONS!☜
All day long people misunderstand one another. It's kind of a miracle we all get along as well as we do, don't you think?
A hundred years from now no one will care how you looked ~ what kind of car you drove ~ how much money you had in the bank, but they will know if you made the difference in the life of a child. The point is not to live forever, but that forever knows you were once here. Unknown
My mother made my brother and me beanbag bunnies fifty years ago, an Easter gift. The guy with the dark glasses is a beatnik,
the other fellow is a hobo. I choose them as the backdrop to this post. It’s hard to believe I've lived upon this earth fifty three and a half years. It's difficult for me to believe I'm ‘old’. Such a lesson in life! Once recently, I mentioned something to my mom about being middle aged, and she said “middle aged”? “Are you expecting to live to be one hundred and six years old”? Smile~~ No I'm not!
I spoke with a fellow blog sister Jenny Fillius recently. We discussed many things…. our appreciation for music, how her daughter wrote a special poem that profoundly touched another, my mother’s radiant health and resilience, our artworks, but most importantly we took on the topic of death, our own to be precise. She and I agree, that for some reason our culture in the United States seems to run away and pretend death doesn’t exist, hides it under the rug. We agree that death should be considered and embraced. It seems, people fill their days doing things to escape thinking about death.
Last year Jenny nearly died and when I was a teenager I might have died, twice. It will change your life forever when you have an experience like this. Once my friend Margaret said “We are one day closer to the last day of our life”. That hit and made me think about how I can appreciate life, especially Mother Nature, about kindness, accepting a smile or kind word or giving one, feeling well and taking good care….the little things. Trying to live in the moment. I remind myself to adjust my focus, so that I have eyes to see the beauty that surrounds. The thing about it is, we only have a short amount of time and the older you get the faster time flies.
I remember my father and my friends who have died and offer a prayer. For me a living will is imperative! Yes, I do think about death, but the blessing is, that it makes me appreciate life. What about you? Do you think about death?
Thank you for taking the time to leave such poignant thoughts and comments. Each of you have expressed thoughts that I relate to. In the middle of the night I cosidered deleating this post (I don't know exactly why). Perhaps I didn't think it would resonate with anyone, but now that I read your experiences, I'm glad left it where it was and thank you.
Friends are there to share in each others joys and sorrows.
Our little family of friends came together to celebrate the birthday of Noelle, yet more difficult..... to honored the life of Tessie her beloved dog and Tessie wasn't just any dog she was an especially smart German Shepherd, who reminded me of my only childhood dog, Gretchen. One night many years ago, Tessie sensed Noelle's house was burning and saved our lives.
We, who especially loved her planted wild flower seeds in her honor, then scattered her ashes off the dock, into the lake at Monkey Manor (a place she liked very much). It wasn't easy, a tear~jerker........yet remarkably, having William and Jacqueline there softened the situation, with their courageous strength of innocence. Later, Andrea and I held hands and sobbed. Neither she or I have children and we fear who will help us out of this world when our time comes? Thankfully, we have one another and carry our faith, that we will not be alone!
NOW!! On to the Happy!! William and Jacqueline helped to create a most wonderful and fanciful party for their mom! They set her birthday party table, in the most imaginative way, using pine cones (they collected) and other things I brought along. They decorated her cake with strawberries, sliced peaches and candles and it looked truly beautiful!
There were presents ..........
And the gift of an especially perfect and not too hot, blue sky day!
Nine days ago (after the green cast came off), I was shocked to see what lie underneath. My sweet wrist was so swollen and I felt fragile, vulnerable.
Also, it looked stuck in a weird position and that terrified me! Still, part of my disbelief, was finally seeing the injury that had been hidden away under splints and casts for along time now.
Seeing my exposed arm reminded me of the accident and that made sick, a mixture of nausea and my heart beating too fast.
Quickly, I realized it was time to deprogram and face my fears, because I choose to be healed.
The process began, by forcing myself to look at bathe, caress & pray over my new wrist, everyday.
Also, finally I had a good cathartic cry (when nobody was around).
Then I wrote down everything..... ALL of my thoughts and feelings.
Two days later like magic, I began to feel stronger inside and out. My wrist became less swollen and it started looking more like it belonged to me. I hit the darkest point, only to realize that the dawn was waiting for me the whole time!
It's a strange feeling because, yes, it is still my left wrist, but in a curious way it is not.
This wrist is different, a new creation, unique from my old one.
Each day I feel stronger and have more courage to remove the splint at home.
Without the cast I can feel my hand starting to come alive, again.
I'm taking lessons in being patient, (not my specialty).
It is still stuck in one position and slightly swollen, but I can wiggle my fingers!!
I give thanks that it was my wrist that took the hit and not my neck.
It's going to take time.
Healing is a process and a beautiful miracle.
I embrace and am motivated to do what it takes to become whole,
My first Orchid has graced our lives now for three and a half months. Amazing!
Have you seen this? Christian Lacroix designed the pretty white filigree Evian bottle above.
A mystery solved! I've always wondered how the saddle stitch was done and realize now, that the trick is two needles!
Marianne (a friend in N.Y.), sent me the link to Advanced Style. This site features stylish older women, who incidentally are mostly artistic people. Now why does that not surprise me?
I've learned that it is not impossible to create a one handed birthday dinner for my husband and two other good friends, but on the other hand it is possible to loose all muscle in upper arm in approximately eleven days.
Really enjoying settling into the book, Shanghai Girls by Lisa See.
Surprised to know, that if I won't be traveling to Paris this year....
Paris came to greet me! Thanks to my exceptional friend, who possesses one creative mind, Somepinkflowers!
Lastly, have you met Catherine? If not, she has an exquisite site called A Thousand Clapping Hands. She creates the most amazing miniature paper Tricorn Hats in the world. Go see!